Open Wide the Doors for Christ!

Thank goodness that we celebrate Easter for an entire week (actually 8 days!) because I have been extremely busy for the last week, and I haven't had the chance to say anything about the most important solemnity of the year.  Happy Easter!  He is Risen!  Continuing my previous thought though, you know what, being busy is OK.  Obviously, I'd like to have been able to have some more free time and be able to write some more posts (and do other things), but I have slowly come to realize over this Easter that my life absolutely has to be about God, and what He wants me to do, not what I want to do.  I'm hoping to churn out a few posts over the next several days all encompassing (or at least relating back to) this all-important point because over everything else that has been going on it is this idea that keeps hitting me.  I guess I have some work to do!  

Alright, first story: being a subdeacon...  After finishing up my classes on Holy Thursday, I endured the long drive home and made it back in time to go to the Mass of the Lord's Supper that evening.  As I have mentioned in the past, we (the family) attend Mass at St. Rose, which is staffed by the F.S.S.P. and has Mass in the Extraordinary Form.  Anyway, I ended up helping out at the end of Mass when they transferred the Eucharist to the reserve Tabernacle and needed a thurifur (interesting fact: it's harder than you think to spin around, incense the Blessed Sacrament, and then continue walking forward without tripping or running into the priest).  

That evening, knowing at this point that I was going to have to be subdeacon for the rest of the Easter Triduum (and not really wanting to), I spent a lot of time praying that God's Will be done and that I'd have the strength and courage to do it.   (Another thing that I learned: don't think that by kneeling the entire 3 hours on Holy Thursday night impresses anybody, but yeah, it does hurt the knees, and thighs, and back...)  Back onto topic: I really wasn't scared of what I would have to do for subdeacon - that sort of thing you can learn in practice - but I was very uncomfortable stepping into that role.  It turned out to be a good - though long - evening of prayer; I had some quality time to think about things, offer them up, and realize that my doing subdeacon was a small way to become a bit more like Christ, especially as we were in the midst of recalling His Passion.  I mean, there I am - trying to spend some time in prayer, as Jesus asked His disciples to do - and it's really hard to complain to Him about being subdeacon when He accepted from God a much, much, harder task.

On Good Friday morning I went for a short run (we are back in the swing of training for a mini-marathon) before myself and my brother headed over to church to do some training for the liturgy that would take place that afternoon.  We returned home after the hour-long practice and found that one set of cousins/aunt/uncle had arrived.  It was one of those things, I wasn't looking forward to the whole subdeacon thing, but I always enjoy hanging out with my extended family immensely, so that took my mind off the whole thing.  We attended Stations of the Cross at noon, followed by a small collation (don't get to use that word too often...) of PB&J's and apples.  3 PM eventually did roll around though, and so back to church I went, feeling at peace with the whole thing but still kind of wishing that I didn't have to.   We (Father, the deacon, and myself) vested in albs/cinctures, with amice and biretta (the first time I had worn either of those) and out we went - them, probably meditating on Christ's passion, me, on the "outfit" I was wearing.  However, my selfish focus wore off pretty quickly when the liturgy began with us prostrating ourselves for a minute on the marble floor of the sanctuary; it was a cold, hard, reminder that His will is more important than mine!  There were a set of prayers/readings that were chanted (during which I didn't have to do much of anything) and then the Passion was chanted (again, I was just standing there).  Next we had the veneration of the cross.  My part was simple: stand next to Father and help him slowly unveil the (large and heavy) crucifix.  It wasn't perfect (I missed one of my genuflections), but nothing went up in flames, or broke, or was invalid, so that's alright.  Then we took off our shoes and walked up to venerate the cross (now supported by two servers) - again reminding me that it has to be about Him, about His will, about loving God and giving yourself entirely to His Will (not about my qualms about wearing a biretta, acting as subdeacon, and everything else)...  The last part of the liturgy went quickly - there was just the distribution of Holy Communion, a few more prayers/readings, and then the procession out, but it was the most uncomfortable and difficult moment for me because this was when I had to put on a tunicle (which looks really similar to the dalmatic which a deacon wears).  As I mentioned before, canonically it's fine for a layman to fill the position of subdeacon (in case of necessity), but I sure didn't feel ready to do so.  Anyway, I put it on, we finished up the liturgy, and that was that.  It wasn't quite as bad as I thought, and the world didn't end when I put it on, but what struck me was how heavy it was.  It wasn't like unbearably weighty, just dense.  It's hard to explain, but I couldn't really forget that it was there, it felt like that lead vest they put over you when you have dental x-rays (I've had plenty of practice with those), but of course, in the liturgy celebrating Good Friday, it had a lot more meaning.  It reminded me (again) that my job in life is to discern, and do, the will of God.  Sometimes that will be enjoying the company of people you love, sometimes that will be struggling to stay awake when squinting for 5 hours, sometimes that will be staying up till midnight praying, and sometimes that will be doing something you don't want to do, stepping outside of your comfort zone, (literally) picking up that cross, or yoke, or tunicle.  

After the liturgy we spent a few minutes talking with other people in the parking lot and many were excited that I got to do subdeacon.  I was certainly less enthusiastic than they were (probably need to work on being more positive), but one person said something to the extent that "I bet that made you think about your vocation didn't it?"  And it did!  Being in that position, and not really wanting to be there, made me think about the call to priesthood.  I don't want to keep using the same phrase, but priesthood is not about me.  It's about giving myself completely to God, and to bringing souls to Heaven for Christ.  It's not like as soon as I'm ordained everything will become comfortable and I'll love doing everything.  Sometimes I am going to have to step into tough situations, do things for people that I don't want to do, or just put myself out there in some way.  

Sorry, this will have to be continued...  It's now midnight and Mass will come early tomorrow.  Gosh, I am so sorry to not have gotten out any posts the last week, but after a few tests, and quizzes, and presentations, and miscellaneous assignments, and going out to eat, and training for the mini-marathon, and practicing for schola, oh, and praying, and reading, and studying - and I just didn't have any time.  Again, I really, really hope to get more written this week (especially since I haven't finished even this whole story, much less all the other ones that tie into it, much less the entire realization of learning to follow Christ more fully...)  My plan is to pump out shorter posts, more often - hopefully that way I'll actually be able to get some completed throughout the last week of classes and finals week.  Hope springs eternal!  

Seriously though, I hope that all of you had an amazing, blessed, truly joyful Easter!  Happy Divine Mercy Sunday!  Pope Saint John Paul II and Pope Saint John XXIII pray for us!

So it's now 10 PM here at the castle (as we like to call it), and I just finished one of the many assignments which were forced onto my to-do list this week (it's probably been my busiest week yet this semester, which is saying a lot) but I really wanted to write a post because the ideas are fresh in my head (I just got back from optional Adoration a while ago - always a good source of such ideas) and I haven't written a post in too long, so here it goes...

Yesterday, as you all know, we celebrated the solemnity of the Annunciation, when Mary accepts God's will for her to become the Mother of God, and thus, the request that the angel brings to her is remembered forever as an announcement of great joy.  I think it is so beautiful when, in the middle of Lent, the Church gives us these glimpses or reminders of the joy that should be building in our hearts in anticipation of our redemption at Easter (which, of course, begins with the Incarnation).

I was talking with a few guys yesterday about why we celebrate the Annunciation and not the Incarnation.  It was the same event, and it sure seems like God becoming man is more important than Mary accepting Him as her Son (despite how important that was!), but, yesterday I had the chance to watch the movie, Mary of Nazareth in theaters (it is screening around the country) and it somewhat put things in perspective.  The movie beautifully portrays the life of Mary from her childhood all the way through the resurrection.  I don't want to spoil the movie, so I'll just make a few points.

Firstly, Mary is gently smiling through a lot of the movie - enough that I noticed it and was beginning to think it was a bit cheesy - but then one of the guys pointed out that she was constantly, consistently, completely abandoning herself to God's will.  She joyfully accepted whatever God requested of her, every time.  Did she always know what that would entail? - no (and the movie did a fantastic job portraying this) but she did always accept it.

Secondly, there was a tenderness and intensity in the relationship between Jesus and Mary that I guess I never realized.  A movie makes things that you read or think about so real.  I was praying the Rosary at that Holy Hour that I just got back from and usually my mind drifts off during the decades about the assumption and coronation of Mary.  I don't have a good image to meditate on in my mind, or a good story from scripture, so my mind usually ends up blank (or worse) and I end the rosary on a low note...  But today, with the images of the movie still fresh in my mind, I found it very easy to see the point of these mysteries.  Of course Jesus brought Mary up to Heaven with Him - She was His beloved mother, not only the most perfect person (other than Himself) to ever walk the earth, but she was the person that Jesus was closest to on earth and she was the person who had cared for Him throughout His life.  Of course He is going to reward her for that constant love with the most perfect of bliss with Him in heaven!  Again, of course He would crown her Queen of Heaven and Earth, not only does she deserve it, but He just gave her to us for our mother.  Going way back into the Old Testament shows us that the queen was the one the people went to, the one who took care of them, the one who was not only mother of the king but also mother of the people.  The movie made all these things make more sense and really come alive in my mind (it was great!)

Thirdly, the movie made the story of our salvation seem so much more real to me.  (Yeah, I just said that in the previous point, but I wanted to keep talking about it, and I wasn't just looking at Jesus' relationship with His mother anymore).  Looking at everything as Mary saw it, as Mary responded to it, is such a beautiful vantage point.  Yes, the movie is the production of human minds - with actors/actresses, scenes, budgets, and everything else.  No, this movie isn't inspired or something - though, of course, it follows the Bible extremely closely.  However, by putting real people into the stories that we read in the Bible it adds an emotional, visceral, and pictorial connection to the drama and reality of our salvation like noting else.  You saw how the lines of the story interwove, how difficult it would have been for Joseph to take Mary into his home, how brutal Herod was, how boldly John the Baptist acted, how trusting Mary was (already mentioned that one...), how merciful Jesus was, how doubtful the Apostles were.  You saw Mary acting as a mother, caring for Jesus, and later (after His death) caring for His apostles.  You saw Mary saying "be it done to me according to Your will" at countless points throughout the story as she encounters something she doesn't understand or any moment of suffering.  It all leapt off the page of scripture and into flesh and blood, into images that I will now be able to meditate on.  I don't want to make this movie into something it isn't, but it was pretty inspiring, and the more I think about it the more depth it adds to my own understanding of the whole mystery of redemption.  

In other words, it was a great movie, highly recommended, not perfect, but very thought-provoking (in the best sense of the phrase) and something that I am very glad I cleared time to do.  It's so much more than I managed to mention in this post, there are so many more thing that it will show me in the weeks to come, but I certainly can't write them all, so I guess you'll have to see it for yourself...

Now, off to bed.  I can't promise that I will get to posting more often just yet, I keep wanting to, and I keep (like everyday) having great ideas for posts, but apparently there are only 24 hours in the day and I'd like to be in bed for a few of them...  Good night!  Happy Lent!

As I start this post it is right before our retreat starts at St. Meinrad (so the no electronics policy hasn't started yet), and I wanted to write a short post about something I found in The Priest is Not His Own, by Venerable Fulton Sheen.  I've been reading the book for a while (I probably started it nearly a year ago), but it is somewhat long, very dense (in a good way), and I have had a pile of books which I am reading simultaneously (which slows down how fast one can read through one book).  

Anyway, on pages 200-213 he talks about the Eucharist (a topic that goes throughout the entire book, but this happened to be the place that I started today, so it's what I wanted to make a post on).  He begins by looking at the Old Testament, how Melchizedek, and his sacrifice of bread and wine, prefigure Our Lord, and His sacrifice of bread and wine (which, of course, is Himself).  This probably is an obvious type (where something in the Old Testament prefigures something in the New), but Bishop Sheen goes further: what does Abraham do when he gains victory (saving Lot)?  Instead of taking the spoils for himself, Melchizedek arrives and blessed Abraham, reminding him that the spoils, the victory, are truly God's.  

Next, Bishop Sheen looks at the bread of the presence in the Old Testament.  This is another obvious type of the Eucharistic bread that Christ will give in the New Testament.  I quote: 

Finally, he looks at the New Testament.  The first words Jesus speaks (in John's Gospel) are "What would you have of me?" [John 1:38]  It is a question that we should all ask ourselves.  Are we coming to Jesus Christ for worldly power or prestige, money, military power, or some other worldly good?  Are we coming to take some part of what Jesus says, but not quite everything?  John and Andrew, when they first came to Jesus, got it right.  They accepted everything, they didn't say, well, we like the healing the sick part, but not so much the picking up one's own cross.  They simply asked Jesus "where are you staying?".  As Fulton Sheen explains, we need to do the exact same thing - go to where Jesus is present - accepting everything from Him who gives us everything in the Eucharist.  

I am now back from my retreat, which was awesome by the way, and this theme, to be open to Christ coming into my life and transforming it, seems to keep reappearing everywhere.  On the drive back from Effingham on Thursday, I listened to a podcast by Fr. Michael Schmitz, which was his homily for Christmas Eve.  In that homily he reiterated that Jesus came into the world out of love, He wants to enter your life - your entire life, the good and the bad - and transform it.  He was born into a cold cave at Bethlehem, was laid in a slimy, nasty, manger, and visited by the not-so-spiritually-great shepherds.  But that is the entire message of Christmas, that God becomes man precisely to enter our broken, messed-up, hard world.  He comes as a man so that He can save all men from their sins and bring them to Himself.  It is up to us to accept that invitation.  To meditate on the beauty, tenderness, and love shown to us in the Incarnation, but also on the same beauty, tenderness, and love that Jesus shows to us everyday in the Holy Mass.  We must receive him into our lives just as Mary did.  We must have incredible reverence, devotion, and love for this incredible gift of Himself - something the Israelites forgot to their peril.  And finally, we must give absolutely everything to God, just like Abraham did.  (Side note: Abraham is often called the father of faith, but it's important to remember that faith is more than just believing/agreeing with doctrines, dogmas, etc.  Faith means we give our lives to God and let Him change us.  It means acting differently! - something I learned today in a talk by Bishop Paprocki to a men's prayer breakfast here in Quincy.)  Let Christ entering into your heart, especially in the Eucharist, totally transform your life!  There is so much more to say here, but I have run out of time, so I'll have to leave you with that for now...

Alright!  Well, that post ended completely differently than I had intended it too, but blogger.com stopped working so I lost the last half and had to retype it (and I went into a totally different topic).  Think of it this way, it means I have something else to write about later!  Anyway, I am now in the last days of my Christmas break, having been running around non-stop since it started, having still not completed the application to the N.A.C., and having not read all dozen, or so, books that I wanted too.  Good thing I'll have tons of free time this semester... (not!)  Ah well, business is a sign of abundant blessings I suppose.  

Happy First Saturday!...  I don't know if I've ever wished someone that before, but I guess it can be done, right?  Actually, we should be very happy, because on Saturdays (especially 1st Saturdays) we honor Mary, and that should make us happy, because Mary is awesome!  (I'll have to expound on that in some other post, because that one word isn't very descriptive in today's society...)  Anyway, drum roll please: this post will be a little bit more important than my typical "sorry, I don't have much time, here's a cool video" post...  :-)  

And that is because I am finally able to announce to you all that I will be applying to study at the Pontifical North American College - in Rome, Italy - for my upper/theology level seminary!  It is located within Vatican City (i.e. it overlooks St. Peter's Basilica!), and has about 250 seminarians from the United States, Canada, and Australia.  If I get accepted, which is somewhat likely, but not guaranteed (they are at, or almost at, capacity right now), I will be heading over to Italy in mid-July (as in, 7 months from now!), to spend 8 weeks, or so, in Italian immersion.  That is very important because all the classes (which start in October, I believe), are taught in Italian...  

It's a little scary - not so much the language (that is overcome-able by hard work), but mostly just how far away I will be from everything I know (and love) back home.  But, while it's incredibly daunting, it is also incredibly exciting (as you can imagine)!  Please, as always, keep me in your prayers - that God's will may be done. 

Part of the reason that I haven't been good at posting stuff over this Christmas break is that I have been really, really busy trying to fill out all the forms (all 30 pages of them!), getting the requisite check-ups, and writing the required autobiography.  I have so many plans for great posts, but I just haven't had time to write them!  Unfortunately, I'm going to have 19 credit hours next semester, so unless I stay really organized I don't think my rate of posting is going to go up...  (We'll see!)
In other news: I just got back from a wonderful First-Friday, First-Saturday vigil (which started with the Rosary, then Mass, then Exposition, then many, many devotions, then Benediction, and Mass again at 1 in the morning - it was fantastic!)  Also, later today I will be heading down to Effingham where I will meet the other Springfield-diocese Brute guys and we will car-pool over to St. Meinrad where our retreat is happening.  It will last until Wednesday, at which point, I will come back home, finish all the application stuff, and then get some more blogging done before going back to Brute on next Sunday.  Man, this break has gone by way too fast!  

view from St. Peter's dome - overlooking the city of Rome

Merry Christmas everyone!  I am still racing around doing all the visiting that comes along with Christmas, so I haven't had a chance to get any blogging done...  A quick update:  Midnight Mass at St. Rose was beautiful.  Christmas day with mom's side of the family was a lot of fun (I did some snow-boarding the next day with my brother and some cousins which was also fun).  We came back on Thursday only to leave for dad's side of the family on Friday.  We did some rock-climbing on Friday afternoon, and got together with the rest of the family today (also fun).  Basically, I have spent the last 4 days eating way too much good food and having a fantastic time with my extended family.  However, I have been thinking about a post on the more important part of Christmas (you know, the part about Christ).  It may be a few more days though because tomorrow I have the Springfield Diocesan Christmas get-together and I am also working on some posts for Deacon David Marcotte, who is currently on a pilgrimage throughout Europe.  So, here is another video of another good Christmas song - this time from the Piano Guys (they are pretty funny/crazy).  Enjoy!

 

Well, after staying up until (almost) 4AM yesterday, I finally got my metaphysics paper done and turned it in yesterday afternoon (it was a great feeling!).  I think the paper turned out pretty good in the end.  Earlier this week I was spending pretty much all my free time on that paper and it just wasn't coming together how I wanted it to.  I was talking about teleology (that things, particularly humans, have ends, in our case, happiness in God) and this allows morality/ethics to exist.  Basically, without teleology, everybody has to figure out their own end (power, money, pleasure, work, whatever), and for this reason (along with some other logical/metaphysical reasons) teleology must exist and ethics must be based on it.  It was a really cool paper and unfortunately this summary doesn't do the topic justice (my paper didn't either I imagine), but I am really glad that I finally found the sources that I needed to finish the paper off. 

 

I still have to finish up the senior seminar paper, something that I will work on for the next hour or so before meeting with Dr. Denz (the professor for that class).  Hopefully he's happy with my (very) rough draft that I gave him a few weeks back. 

 

Next week I have all the typical finals - Monday: calculus and moral issues (neither will be easy, but shouldn't be impossible either), Tuesday: Augustine and Aquinas (again, it'll take studying, but I'll be ready), Wednesday: senior seminar and psychology (senior sem. is a take-home, but will probably be one of my hardest finals, psychology is a presentation and should be easy), and Thursday: metaphysics (tough, but should go alright).  I am very glad that my finals are spaced out over the week - usually I'd want to get them done as quickly as possible, but all my classes are tough this semester, so I am glad that I should have enough time to study before each one.

 

the holly tree in Brute's courtyard

Of course, the fun doesn't stop just because everybody is getting ready for finals!  This afternoon we are going to play some football (in the snow!), and (recap from the previous post) this evening we have the first-ever Brute talent show.  The Springfield guys will be doing something, and there are a bunch of other guys who will be showing off as well.  It should be awesome!  Tomorrow there are a bunch of us going caroling at a Catholic nursing home (actually the same one that Ray and I have for our ministry) - it was a blast last year, and this year, I'm sure, won't be any different.   On Sunday evening I'm going with some guys to Cincinnati for "lessons and carols", which is some sort of Advent/Christmas concert put on by the seminary up there.

 

Fr. Joe said something quite profound in his homily this morning.  He said that Advent is a time to deepen our faith and, like the blind men in the Gospel this morning, ask Jesus to heal the places within our soul that are broken, hurt, warped, or suffering.  This same faith must then give us the insight to see our life (physically and spiritually) as it really is, a gift from God, and then give our lives back to God.  To cultivate those talents, abilities, and blessings that we have been given, and use them for the greater glory of God and the good of all His creation.  Obviously, my summary is lacking the awesomeness and persuasion that father included in his homily, but my brain is a bit fried from the past few days...

 

I hope you have all had a good (almost) first week of Advent.  I hope to get back to blogging more frequently once I knock out these finals.  May the mercy and love of the Sacred Heart enflame you with His joy, peace, love, and energy on this first Friday, especially in this beautiful season of Advent.

Oh, happy feast of St. Nicholas!

Also, I'm going to post some videos that I've found during this week (they're cool and I won't have time to post something more substantial...)

Well, I am back home for a brief Thanksgiving break, and since I don't really feel like working on a philosophy paper, I figured I might as well work on some blogging that I am behind on.  After typing up the first day of NCYC, I decided to split the event into a few posts (because, as always, I'm being long-winded and one post with everything would be daunting to read).

So, as I previously have briefly mentioned, NCYC (the National Catholic Youth Conference) was here in Indianapolis on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.  I was looking forward to this event ever since I heard it would be happening this semester.  Usually, to be quite honest, I'm more of an introvert.  However, upon entering seminary I have found the courage (let's be honest, it's grace) to be a bit more open, outgoing, and willing to talk with people.  Anyway, I was greatly looking forward to the opportunity to hang out with 25,000 (!) young Catholics.  I remember how great of a time I had just a few years back when I got to hang out with other young Catholics (though not nearly as many) and seminarians - it was awesome!  Thus, though I am now on the other "side" of the exchange, I figured it would be pretty cool. 

Thursday was the first day of the conference, and the kids started showing up at the conference center mid-afternoon.  The Springfield and Knoxville seminarians, because groups from our dioceses hadn't shown up yet, were assigned to serve Mass for the Jefferson City, MO diocesan group at 2PM.  We showed up at the convention center (which, by the way is enormous - like probably 1/2 a mile long) somewhere around noon, got registered with the volunteer people, and picked up our name-tags (enormous and kind of gaudy, but everybody wore one so it wasn't weird I guess) and t-shirts (which had "SEMINARIAN" printed on the back, so we were very obvious).  We got to the room that this particular Mass was happening in (other dioceses had their own Masses going on throughout the afternoon), and waited, and waited...  The group apparently was delayed because while their priests showed up on time the rest of the folks didn't trickle in until after 3.  We, meanwhile, had walked a few blocks over to the mall to get something to eat.  It was starting to get busy over there as everybody was starting to show up and I felt really conspicuous in my SEMINARIAN garb, but it was pretty cool to see everybody (and chat with a few people).  I didn't get anything for lunch because I wasn't very hungry (and I'm cheap), so we eventually wondered back and waited a bit more.

I guess Mass was my first disappointment - not that Mass itself is bad - but we were squashed into the front row, the altar was just a table on a stage, the music was too "enthusiastic" for my tastes, we didn't [get to] kneel for the Consecration (which ended up absolutely destroying whatever remnant of concentration I had left) - I don't know, it just wasn't a fantastic experience...  There were some bits that were really good: I had a moment after receiving Communion of deep prayer (love it when that happens) and the priests concelebrating Mass were reverent.  Mass itself was great, but the craziness of the environment didn't lend itself to concentration, so I didn't pray as well as I was hoping.

After Mass we wondered back around to the volunteer station. I believe we then wondered through the thematic park, which wasn't open yet (we snuck through a door that someone left open) but was basically a huge open room with tons of booths from different places (religions orders, schools, companies, musicians, etc.). After checking things out we headed over to the mall again to get some dinner (by now I was hungry, those snacks in the volunteer zone were wearing off).  However, by now the mall was absolutely full of people.  I mean, every food-producing-vendor was absolutely swamped.  So, we gave up on getting something substantial and slammed down a few more peanut butter crackers and granola bars.



lots of people!

At this point we were told to report over to Lucas Oil Stadium for assignments, and upon wondering over there I found that I was (along with most of the other guys) assigned to manning the sidewalks and getting people to their buses after the event.  I managed to evade being called on to carry around a phone and be in charge of things (remember, I'm an introvert) and was told to report to my yellow zone by 9:15.  The event had already semi-started at 6 or 7 with different bands and stuff (it was now almost 8 PM), but the program seemed to indicate that the real start would be around 8 with some sort of key-note speech thing.  I was pretty enthusiastic about getting in there and seeing all the excitement and what-not, so I found a spot near the entrance (so I could make an exit later) along with a bunch of other sem.'s and settled in for the event.  Basically, I was disappointed to find that there wasn't ever much of a talk.  Don't get me wrong, the loud, upbeat music was great, but I got tired pretty quickly of jumping out and hollering out the next refrain to whatever motion was supposed to happen for this song.  It was fun to begin with, but after an hour or so I was tired and really just wanted to sit there and listen to a enthusiastic, passion-filled speech.  Music is fine and dandy, but I wanted some meat to chew on and get excited about.  The faith is so much more than music!  Anyway, I was disappointed.  Apparently, this evening was primarily all about getting people hyped up and excited for the next few days.  Anyway, it wasn't working for me (though most everybody else seemed to be having a blast.



crazy lights!

Shortly after 9 I headed down to my spot near the buses and caught up with Jeff who was in charge of that zone.  He had figured out which buses went where - Youngstown, New York, Lexington, Louisville, etc... - so I tried to remember the order while waiting for the even to finish up and everybody start poring out.  A bit after 10 the first people started leaving and over the next 20 minutes or so people began to flow pretty constantly out and head for their buses.  Unfortunately (for us), they all seemed to know where they were going, so our job of directing traffic turned out pretty pointless.  Anyway, our zone ended pretty quickly (most people must have headed out of other doors), so we walked down to another zone to see if they were done.  Unfortunately, they weren't.  So we hung out with the group that was stranded (their bus was late), trying (unsuccessfully) to stay warm amid the slow drizzle of 35 degree rain...  I actually enjoyed this part a bit because I got to talk with a few of the young people.  I had spent the entire day surrounded by crowds of people, but I hadn't really had a chance to interact.  All the kids that I talked with were really cool - they had really strong faith, were discerning where God wanted them to be, and were a lot of fun to spend 10 minutes or so chatting with.  It was great!

Lucas Oil Stadium - Tons of Young Catholics!

Well, the rain wasn't so great, but eventually the bus did show up.  After that group was on there way pretty much everything was done - we hiked back over to the car, drove back to Brute, I ate some eggs/sausage shortly before midnight, and then crashed.  It was a long day, lots of fun, very crazy, incredibly exhausting - in other words pretty good I suppose...

Below is a video of some clips that I took at the event Thursday evening - it was pretty amazing to be there!

Good afternoon!  Well, winter is upon us!  We don't have any snow (yet), but it has gotten cold here in Indy (barely got above freezing today).  I was feeling like I had been lazy the last week or two (exercise wise), so I rode my bike to Marian and back today.  Cue the weird feeling of sweating inside and freezing outside of the coat. 

 

As always (at least for this time of the semester), I am really, really busy.  I think this semester has probably been the most crazy of all my previous ones.  I have 3 big (8, 10, and 15 page) philosophy papers due in the next week or so, and that doesn't count any of the finals (which I haven't even thought about yet).  We have to finish recording the schola Christmas CD tomorrow.  I have to get a letter in the mail to my sister, so she can get it before Advent starts.  Yep, so I'm busy!

However, the semester is going really, really, well!  Being busy is a bit fun, it's a challenge to over come and an opportunity to get better spiritually, intellectually, and every-other-which-way-ally.

 

NCYC was phenomenal.  It was tiring at times, and boring at times, and a bit crazy at times, but I had a wonderful, wonderful time.  I got some posters from the Catholic to the Max booth ($15 for 3 of them).  One is Jesus as Divine Mercy, on is of St. Michael, and one is of Mary with Jesus.  They are beautiful!  I hope to get a post up (with pictures and video) of NCYC asap, but that very well could be at the end of the semester...  (sorry).

 

That's my life for now.  I'll be heading home tomorrow evening to celebrate thanksgiving with the family.  I am sure that will be a great time as well!

Ah well, back to work.

This semester has been absolutely flying by. Not only has every week sped by, due to a relatively heavy course load (last week it still felt like Tuesday on Thursday), but the weekends too have been absolutely chock full of stuff to do (sports, hanging out, events, talks, homework, ministry). It's now my third semester in the seminary, and each one gets better and better. Sure, there were some ups and downs, but seriously, overall it has been absolutely phenomenal so far. That is why I am so surprised at the fact that it is almost over. I only have one full week of classes left (this week is cut short by NCYC, next week by thanksgiving, and the week after that is the week before finals)! It's absolutely crazy! I can clearly remember moving in at the beginning of the semester, and meeting all the new guys, and the first week of classes, and the first wave of tests, and the first discernment dinner, and the many, many community dinners, and the talks on campus, and the midterms, and the soccer tournament, and wow, there has just been so much happening... It has been wonderful, overwhelming, full of growth, and (almost) constant joy! Some of the guys are starting to want the semester to end; I feel like it has just begun. There is so much more to learn, so many more prayers to be said, so much more growth to be had, so much more fun to do. Gosh, I guess it's not a bad problem to have. God is so good! 

Well, that's all for now - sorry, I really want to write something fantastic, deep, and funny, but I'm currently deep into my Augustine/Aquinas and Senior Seminar papers (neither of which will finish themselves), and I should probably focus on getting those done first. Love God, Have fun, and Be Not Afraid!

Please let me know in the comments if this post is almost unreadable because the words are chopped off at the end of each line.  I keep seeing it on my end, and want to make sure that it is just a problem with my computer...  Thanks!

It is that time of the semester when I always start to feel a bit overwhelmed.  This last week, for instance, has been an exercise in frustration during which I have been struggling through an Augustine/Aquinas paper on the relationship between faith and reason.  I naively thought that the 8-12 page paper would be easy enough that I could get by without figuring out an overall organization/structure beforehand.  Of course, that plan has since backfired on me.  Not only has it been difficult to keep some semblance of cohesiveness and conciseness to the paper, but the last week has been absolutely packed with things to do.

 

I thought that I would finish the paper on Wednesday, but then I had all my typical classes, a discernment dinner along with Mass in the evening, and Adoration that night, so I didn't get very far - 6 pages done.  Over Thursday, I thought for sure that I would make some progress, but then I was busy keeping on top of metaphysics and calculus during the day, we had Adoration and Mass at Marian in the afternoon, then I played racquetball, did schola practice, and was left with only the late evening (when I don't seem to get anything done), and predictably didn't get anywhere - 7 pages done.  Surely, I thought, I could finish it off on Friday - not!  My day was again full of classes, and though I tried to get stuff done in the afternoon, I didn't know where exactly I was going, and then Fr. Presta, the vice-rector of Mundelein seminary, visited in the evening, and once again I didn't get anywhere - 8 pages done.  Saturday? - nope.  We had Mass, then a work session,  then ministry, then a community dinner, then a marshmallow roast (which was a blast!), and I didn't get to bed until midnight, having gotten little completed - 8.5 pages done.  Sunday? - no again.  I cantored at Mass, then hung out with some guys who had been here last year and were visiting, then I struggled through another page of the paper, then took a short nap, then had a community dinner, then had Holy Hour, then our last football game, and then I went to bed having gotten little progress made - 10 pages done.

 

Basically, I have concentrated just about every free minute of the week on one paper, and it still isn't done.  I was hoping to knock it out quickly so as to get going on my harder and longer papers due in Senior Seminar and Metaphysics, but the combination of my lack of planning and a packed week just didn't work to my favor.

 

Anyway, that is what I've been up to over the past week.  Unfortunately, the next few weeks look to be just as packed, and I'll have just as much to get done, but I guess it will all get done eventually.  Man, this post wasn't very positive was it?  Ah well, I've been having a lot of fun, reading a lot of good sources, and - you know - it's been good, just busy.  Tonight the Springfield guys have a vocation night at Eastern IL university (I think at the St. John Newman center) organized by Fr. John Titus.  It should be fun, but, again, it will cut into my time for doing schoolwork.  Gosh, I wish I wasn't so busy staying on top of school and had more time to work on the other areas of formation (or maybe just had some free time...)  Anyway, I guess I better get back on it. 

Good morning all!  As I am inclined to say right before writing a really long post: this post will be short.

Sorry for the lack of blogging over the past week or two, I have found it harder than I expected to find stuff to write about now that I am home.  

On Friday, I attended the home school group monthly get-together.  We've been members of it ever since I can remember (I was home schooled from first to twelfth grade), and I can remember many fun times growing up and going to it.  Anyway, we played some Frisbee, I watched all the kids give their presentation (the activity for this month) - some were pretty cool: valence electrons, organic polymers, piano recitals, and other, various, cool presentations.  We stuck around as the mom talked throughout the afternoon, played some soccer in the parking lot (not quite as fun as "real" soccer), and got home around 6.

On Saturday, we participated in the Bridge the Gap.  It is a running race that we have done before, which is pretty cool because it goes across one of the Quincy bridges and back on the other.  It's a fun little 5K, but I always underestimate ho hard it will be.  The first mile is easy: you start going up this steep hill, but it's only about 2 blocks and the rest of the mile is mostly downhill as you cross over the first bridge.  Thus, I finished the first mile in a blistering 6:30 or so.  The second mile, though, entails crossing back over the second bridge.  And, it is all uphill.  Literally, the entire mile is a pretty good uphill climb.  Anyway, I finally finished the second mile (at which point I was right at a 7:00 min/mile pace) and went down the hill after the 2nd bridge and onto the (relatively) flat last mile.  Unfortunately, I was "recovering" from the 2nd mile and didn't ever bump up the pace like I wanted to.  Either way, I made sure to stay up with this other guy who appeared to be near my age and managed to spring the last tenth of a mile or so and pass him.  I got 2nd in my age group and 8th place overall (surprised myself with that one!).  I finished in 21:52 (something like that), which is a 7:04 min/mile, and which also is about as fast as I've ever run a 5k.  I think I may have gone a bit faster in some of the training runs for the half-marathon, but those were probably a good bit more flat.  Ah well, I think I could have gone a bit faster, but in hind site I always think I could have done better, so there you go...  

On Sunday, we did Mass at St. Rose, where I was recruited to serve - no biggie...  That afternoon we started packing for vacation.  As a family, we try to go on a vacation (almost) every year.  This year, which is "bigger" than normal, we are going to Yosemite.  So, we decided to start the fun a week early and begin to pack what we would be bringing.  Of course, seeing it as a challenge, my goal is to pack everything in a bag that can be carried on the airplane (they have a specific size that you can't go over).  Anyway, this gets a bit more difficult when you try to fit a back-pack, hiking shoes, a laptop, and the clothes in the carry on bag...  Have no fear, I'll get it in there, but I sure hope I don't have to open it until we get there.  I can zip it up right now, but still need to fit in another pair of shoes, the computer, and a shirt.  

On Monday, I started my summer job over at Titan Wheel.  It isn't that there is less going on...  The job begins at 7:30 AM, so I go to Mass at 6:30 AM every morning.  So far the job has been pretty good - just getting back into the swing of things from last summer - we'll see how it develops.  I get done at 4:00PM and then we usually have something going on that takes up the rest of the evening.  If we don't have something going on, I typically manage to waste the evening hours before hitting the sack around 10 PM so that I can get several hours of shut-eye before the alarm goes off.  

So there you have it, the last few days have been non-stop stuff to do.  (did I mention I had to sign up for Spanish on Thursday, or the packet pick-up for the race on Friday, or the after-Mass group we went out for lunch with on Sunday, or the mowing I helped out with on Monday...)  Don't think that I am complaining - but I am busy...

OK, all that writing leads me to what I actually wanted to get to.  Today, mid-day prayer, which I prayed during my lunch break, had this as its concluding prayer:

God of mercy,this midday moment of restis your welcome gift.
Bless the work we have begun,
make good its defects
and let us finish it in a way that pleases you.
Grant this through Christ our Lord.
– Amen.

I thought that the entire prayer was such a beautiful thing to say in the middle of a busy, tiring, sometimes annoying and frustrating day.  Yesterday, I was going around to the lock-boxes around the plant and checking to see if all the locks were present and working.  Anyway, this one box was inside an office of sorts and while I was checking out the locks, a few guys came in off the paint line, where they had been working, and the one guy said to me "you have a pretty tough job there don't you" - briefly the thought of how greasy the locks were, or how many different boxes there were to audit, or how long it would take me to type up the results popped into my head - and they I looked over at him sitting there peeling off the plastic suit that he had been wrapped in (it was probably 80 out) while spraying paint, and it hit me that just maybe his job was more tough than mine.  You know, how I got to take the golf cart around to the different boxes, or how I could sit in an air-conditioned office for most of the day, rather than just my lunch break...  You know, how my job was plush compared to his, and I had no reason at all to complain about it...

I thought this prayer was such a beautiful way to remind ourselves of the gift that every day truly is.  How each and every moment, those of rest, those of work, those of fun, those of sorrow, can be seen as an opportunity to grow closer to God.  To thank Him for the good, to ask His help through the laborious, to see His love in the joyful, and find the path to Him through the sorrowful.  "and let us finish it in a way that please you." - It is incredible when you actually pay attention to the prayers that we say each day.  Seriously, I say the prayers of the Mass every day, I (try to) say the prayers of the rosary every day, I say the Divine Office every day, and yet these beautiful reminders of God's love, mercy, aid, generosity, and everything else are so easy to miss.  You know, it's going to be easy to see that when on vacation - when everything is fun, and there aren't any worries - but what happens when I get back?  When Monday comes around and I have to go back to work.  That is when it is more important than ever to see God's presence, and love around us, and use our everyday lives to grow closer to Him.  I think it was in the Gospel today when Jesus says that whoever isn't against me is for me.  I think that that can also be said of everyday live - it doesn't have to lead us to Christ, but it sure can if we let it...  Just a thought.  My hope is that by trying to find Christ everywhere, I can find more to blog about as the summer goes by - we'll see what happens when Spanish gets started in a few weeks...

"Grant this through Christ Our Lord - Amen"

Well folks, I find myself with a few minutes of free time today, a position that is uprising considering that finals will be in full swing in 2 weeks.  Assignment wise, I have 3 papers left: one for theology (4 pages), one for Asian philosophies (3 pages), and one for Shakespeare (10 pages).  Lets just say that I've been postponing the Shakespeare one for a few weeks, but I'm now down to about 10 days to get it done (so I really need to start it).  Otherwise, there is a small assignment in Sociology, and a group project in Shakespeare and I think that is it before finals.  Unfortunately, (in my opinion) all of my classes have finals.  The one for ethics class will be take home (so, that is nice), but most are also cumulative, which I don't particularly enjoy.  Don't feel too sorry for me, I'll make it through alright, but don't expect a ton of posts appearing (not only am I busy, but there isn't a ton of cool stuff happening around here - pretty much everybody is getting busy).  

Yesterday's barbecue with the Serra club (a group that seeks to "foster and affirm vocations to the priesthood and vowed religious life") was a lot of fun.  They attended Evening Prayer with us (and seemed quite proficient in saying it), and then provided a delicious dinner for us.  We ate outside in the courtyard because it was such a beautiful day, and the addition of pulled pork (smoked and sauced)  pretty much made my day.  We threw a Frisbee around for a little while afterwards; it was just for fun, and helped work off the extra plate I ate.  It was actually quite funny; we began playing monkey-in-the-middle with the Frisbee and I somehow ended up guarding Luke (trying to block his throws and/or intercept ones going to him).  Well, lets just say that I am not the tallest guys at the seminary, and Luke is, so there was (quite literally) more than a foot difference in our height.  Not only that, but his arm-span is tremendous.  Needless to say, it was a bit comical, but we still managed to have a fun time.

Tonight we have a inter mural Frisbee game over at Marian, which should be quite competitive.  So far the team I am on has barely lost both our games (within I believe 2 points each time).  Anyway, we are hoping to win tonight...  

On another note, our running training is starting to wind down.  We ran 9 miles on Sunday, and we will probably run 3 or 4 miles for the 3 times this week.  Next week we have one 8 miler, and then it's very easy with I believe a 2 mile run and some walking.  I guess the theory is that we have peaked at 12 miles (so we can definitely do the 13.1 on the 4th), and now we are resting up for the race.  Actually, we met with Fr. Rick Nagel (the pastor at St. John's downtown who is running the race for vocations that day) when we did the ceremony on Sunday at Brute thanking Arch-bishop Buechlein.  He asked us to serve the Mass of the night before (which goes along with a pasta dinner for all the runners), which we, of course, agreed to do.  It should be a lot of fun!

Well, that's all I have for right now.  Sorry these last few posts have been so boring; I haven't managed to think of anything extraordinary, so I'm just trying to keep you up to date.  Keep me in your prayers.  The last few weeks are always the hardest.  Have a fantastic day!

It's St. George's feast day, so I chose this (pretty cool) picture of him.

Sorry for the slow-up on posts recently.   I  keep running across good stuff, but I am running out of time to write up something about them.   With mid-terms and stuff coming up next week I have about an essay on Thursday, and essay and quiz on Friday  two or three essays next week and 4 or 5 mid-terms...  It should be fun!

Everybody, pray for Pope Benedict today - tomorrow is his last day as pope.  Sede vacante  [the seat is vacant] starts at 8 PM Rome time (1 PM Central Time, 2 PM Eastern Time).  I am in the process of reading his final speech (video here), so whenever I get a chance I'll probably post some good bits out of that.

Sorry, this post is pretty short - I'm about to take off to class (Asian Philosophies), and wanted to take the moment to explain why the posts have slowed up (and probably won't speed back up till next week...)

Looks like a good, but busy, few days.  Stay joyful folks!